So one of the reasons that I am trying to remain single is because of a guy that I am going to see tonight. A little history might be in order before I go on about how this all came about.
We meet two and 1/2 years ago when I first moved to Denver. I didn't really know anyone and basically moved out here for work. I meet him at a bar, the owner had invited me and said that i would enjoy myself. Knowing really know one I found it my time to network. I was outside smoking and on the phone with the boyfriend that I had left back in New York. He walked up to me and I turned around and just stared. Here is this guy standing right next to me, looking at me, and listening to my phone call. I hung the phone up and he said, sorry to interrupt I just wanted to say you have some amazing legs." Here is the point where I'm like great I am getting hit on by some jerk with a a stupid pick up line. I say thanks and turn to leave. He then proceeds "sorry, I didn't want it to seem like a pick up line, but you do. I am a runner and can tell you are as well." I am very intrigued. Yes I am a runner and we continue conversation for a while and I decide, hey I know no one here why not give him my number.
A few days later he ask me out. At this time I have lost "my buzz" and decide maybe he is not my type. After many simple "no thank you" responses he send me a text, of him, with his shirt off, in the mirror. Oh my god, was that not one of the hottest most sculpted bodies but also the most ballsy thing a guy has ever done to get me to go out on a date with him, so I agree(plus he looks very close to Mario Lopez). We hit it off and continue dating.
We get to the point in our relationship where we say "i love you" and have meet each others' families. And then one day out of the blue we get into a huge argument and he tells me he has never loved me and never will. Needless to say I leave the relationship heartbroken. He then comes back to me and tells me he is an idiot and I take him back. Then I find out the business trip that he went on was more for pleasure. I break up with him. He comes back tells me how much of an idiot he is and I take him back (do you see a pattern yet). After a while I feel I can not trust him even though nothing really has happened since his trip and we break up. Ok this last cycle repeats it self for about another year, we break up we get back together it really is very toxic. I must really be into inflicting pain on myself. I him (if you watch sex and the city) to mister big.
So there is the history and now I have agreed to have dinner with him (are companies work together so there is little change of us "never talking again"). One side of me is happy and the other side is filled with doubts. On one hand he is ok in bed ( I say ok because my sexual side has gone more to the S&M side and he is more of a vanilla kind of guy). We did have a wonderful sexlife when we first got together, but I know now there are things that I like in bed that just might scare him. On the other lesser hand, he is well established in his career and really has nothing to worry about. He wants kids and marriage (he is 35) and I want to travel and just live, I do believe that I won't ever have kids ( I'm 23 btw).
I will see how dinner goes and let you all know what happens. Advice appreciated.