And the crazyness starts all over again.

Well I have no idea where to begin. After being in Ga for the summer Q and I broke up. I had a feeling that while he was in Co and I was in Ga he was seeing someone else, and guess what I was right. Go me, I guess. I got back to Colorado and decided that I wasn't going to date anyone..... That lasted for about a minute. His name, well letter for the purpose of this blog, is K.

Well K and I get a long great. We are both super silly together. But in real terms we are more like really good friends. I mean the sex is there but its not super passionate. I mean I miss the super aggressive kissing, being completely intertwined. both bodies glistening with sweat just having your back arch from a full body orgasm. It has been a while that I must say.

Plus it put a lack on my story writing. And then on top of all of that Q is playing games with my head.....I hate it. I found out that at my new job I work with his current girlfriend. Well needless to say she is a bitch, not just to me but also everyone else. Then the other night he comes out to tell me that they broke up (doubt it) and then he attempts to kiss me a few times (but I wouldn't let him, I don't cheat). I can't get him out of my damn head.

It has been a while

I know that I have not been keeping up with this, not much to really report.

I have been down in Georgia since may. Q and I have broken things off due a lot to the fact that we have not seen each other for a few months. Ahhh, and now I spend my days taking care of my mom since she had her surgery. As for a sex life, I've got nothing. Since Q left there is nothing. Oh well.... more when I know more.

Smiles all around, I guess

Well these past two weeks have been really eventful. I got laid off from work, which is a blessing and a bunch of shit. I know with the way the economy is it was bound to happen to the arts. I just really hope that the company will survive through all of this. Its sad that the government will bail out dumb fucks that put themselves there but not companies that actually deserve to have help. Oh well, what are you going to do.

With this I am headed back to Georgia to help out the family. My mom broke her collar bone and needs surgery so I am going to go and help. It will be nice to go home since I haven't been in two years. It will be nice to have a little vacation and see some old friends.

Q and I are doing very well. We had a wonderful night and morning, lets just say it left me with a smile on my face. A very big smile, a very much needed smile. More about that later.

Not much to say

Things in my life have been working themselves out some things have not, I feel almost odd.

A few friends that I have known, but have not kept in touch with over the years have passed away. While I feel sad, I feel worse that I lost contact. This also brought an old boyfriend back into my life. It has been about 4 years since I talked to him, and I have realized not much has changed but a a lot has, which seems very odd and has made me wonder.

While Q and I are still together things I guess are not going good. He did find this blog and has since been very upset with the whole me not telling him about M. Plus I know that he is pissed about other things on this blog, but I can't get a word in on it. We don't talk about it when we are in the right state of mind i.e. we have been out drinking. Which this argument has happened three times in the past week and a half. We can't get past this and its just depressing. With this all going on we have a non existent sex life. I can't even begin to tell you how long it has been because it has been that long, sigh. I just don't know what to do anymore.

I think I am going to move back to Georgia. I am really starting to miss my family and it just seems like a good idea. Like I said I just feel odd.

Somethings are back to normal

M is finally out of my apartment!!!!! Him and all of his shit are gone! I am so excited I should be doing back flips, but I can't so I will just smile and enjoy myself.

I got a blast from the past when my ex from GA contacted me on myspace. Its been about four years since I talked to him. He wrote "I have some really exciting news call me when you get this...." I can only thing that two things are to come of this, one he is getting married or having a kid (happens when your young and live in the south) or his band is going on tour and ending up in Denver. I am going to call him tonight when I get home and see what everything is about. It would be nice to catch up with him but I hate reliving memories with an ex.

Q and I had a good night last night. He cooked (because my idea of cooking involves a microwave and something in a plastic dish). It was good but took about four hours. So today I am dragging and just want to take a nap. Maybe if I shut my work door I will or just call it an early day and head home. Q has also turned me into a anime nerd, I have fallen in love with the series called Bleach, you should really check it out.

I also had a great weekend and Q, wink wink. I will write another post on that later when I am not at work.

Crazies in my life

So everything in my life that was a little on the crazy side has seemed to simmer down.

I had to kick M out of my place after being such a jerk to my friends that were spending the weekend with me. I asked him to leave for the weekend because me and three friends would of been to much in my apt. Well he left for the night and then showed up as we are all trying to get over our hang overs and just walks in like nothing is going on and that it is just a normal day. He comes in turns his computer and and just starts playing music (really loud), doesn't say hi or anything. I apologize to my friends and they pack their things up and leave (back to the mountains for work). I try and talk to M and he just keeps turning the music up. I look at him and tell him that he needs to be out by the end of the week. He flicks me off and puts it right in my face. I tell him he needs to get out right this minute. He says he is not leaving. I then have to call my best guy friend, A. He asked who I called and I said you will find out when they get here but the next person I am calling is my dad. So he left and for the past two weeks or more we have been going back and forth so to get his things from my apt. He has even gone as far as to call the cops. The only problem, its my apt and he has no legal standing.

Things with Q are going good. I mentioned before that he found my blog so I guess if he is still reading it then I should say Hi! We had a nice weekend I guess you could say he worked and I went out with friends and then we meet at my place later in the night. I am normally asleep and once I am out I am out. I remember as a kid growing up in Georgia there would be a lot of tornado's that would go through and I would sleep right through them, even thought the fire department was near our house and the sirens were so loud, it would never wake me up. We did get into some mischief Saturday and man has it been a long time. I will post more later on that, it was really really hot.

My grandmother came into town. And though I love her dearly I have a hard time connecting and having a conversation with her. So these next two weeks means that I will be spending more time with the family.

Now I am sitting at work, hating my job like there is no tomorrow. I am in the process of trying to find a new one but with the way everything is right now I am not sure that will happen any time soon.

So I have decided

I am going to keep the blog, I am not going to make it private or censor what I have to say. If people that I know find it I really don't care. I have nothing to hide. If they don't like it then that is their problem. People know that I am very out going and I shouldn't be punished for that.

M and I have come to an understanding that he is moving out. I would feel bad if I just pushed him out the door without a place to stay. I am just not that mean of a person. So he will be around for a while more. I told him that he needs to find a few days during the week to hang out with friends and not stay at my apt so I have some breathing room. He knows that we are not going to work out and that I have been seeing someone else (Q).

Q and I are in a limbo. He found my blog and was pissed that I didn't tell him about M. So I figured we would of broken up (not that I cheated on him with M) because I hid this from him. But I am not sure what is going on. We still chat and still hang out. I am just so anxious about this...sigh.

On a happier note, I got two offers for dates. Not that I am going to take them up on it (everything is so complicated right now) but it is nice to know that people are still out there. I am just going to have to give up on guys for a while.